Hello there, no need to remind you all that we are living in the 21st century because it’s an obvious fact but it is still surprising that I have lived 3 decades and more and have celebrated the same event with the same zeal and rigor every year. I am talking about the International Women’s Day, every year without fail I have cut a cake, sometime more than a cake and will do so for as long as I live. No silly, not because this day makes me happy but because co-incidentally it’s my birthday! Yes, I was born on a beautiful, eventful day and I was so proud of it as if I was the custodian of this occasion, and believe you me, I took it seriously.
Time passed and every year taught me a different lesson, why was I even happy about this day? why couldn’t all the days be so happy, warm, and kind to my fellow women world-wide? Why did people reserve their respects only for the 8th March? Then as I grew up, this day felt more like a joke because I realised those that I believed were reserving their respects were being forced to treat us well but only on that day. I think let’s call it off, let’s not celebrate this day or us anymore. I think women across the globe would be OK to do away with this day, especially women at workplaces.
We have all come a long way and I am thankful to all the women who have helped me become the person that I am. I am glad their stories inspired me, and their toil strengthened my beliefs. I am glad they set nonpareil standards because even the insurmountable challenges in my life look timid and possible. At the same time, I am also thankful to those that taught me to not take my freedom for granted, or let others walk over my ambitions. I celebrate these women every single day, I may still cut the cake on the 8th but I know I am significant and when you realise that, you don’t want anyone to do you the honours.
They say it doesn’t matter,
They say it doesn’t hurt
but the pain stays longer,
and no comfort is enough!
Memories just don’t disappear,
And dialogues keep resurfacing…
The times of togetherness,
Cause pain that’s undying
There’s no respite or freedom,
From the everlasting longing…
There’s no place or dwelling,
With any sense of belonging.
Have been re-visiting moments,
Have been writing stories,
Trying to find that person again
Who’s deeply etched in my memory.
Trying to figure out what should be acceptable and what shouldn’t be at a workplace and what exactly makes the best of the workplaces toxic?
I have been thinking quite a lot about it and have come to believe that the world doesn’t need bosses, but leaders. Visionaries that inspire you to do better. Those that believe in you, believe your actions and are a part of your growth. Those that entrust you with responsibilities to not blame you when things go wrong but to teach you as to why things didn’t work. If learning is an ongoing process and an employee is supposed to learn new things every day, it’s the job of the leader to teach them new things. There’s no shame in learning hence there’s should be no shame in teaching, yet how many bosses teach?
The other thing with toxic places is that they make workers slog like bonded laborer, expecting them to toil outside the working hours, expecting to work overtime, every day. Why do people work? We have probably gotten it all wrong! We all work because perhaps that’s the only thing we are good at, we have spent enough time of our lives doing what we do, so much so that we start finding solace in the discomfort and toxicity of the very place that takes away our piece of mind. Then again you can’t be in shackles and talk confidently about freedom, there are very few things that are actually valuable in life and anybody that tells you otherwise is lying, money is no doubt important but there’s a price that needs to be paid. It baffles me how people sell their soul and it’s commendable how they believe it’s righteous.
I don’t know how to work as a goner, because I have always put my heart and soul into everything, I am hold accountable for, exactly why I take it personally when my work or I am questioned. I don’t know why people think its ok to stomp over someone’s pride, for me it’s not ok. Loud blaring voices, shouting and calling names is unacceptable, and anybody who thinks its normal has made peace with the devil! That’s another problem I have with toxic workplaces, where people think it’s their right to belittle people, whenever, wherever they deem fit. Honestly, it’s not!
I am sure, a lot of such places exist, anyway also glad for not being a part of an organization that leeches on to their employees and takes away their best from them, leaving them in doubt and ambiguity; another characteristic of a toxic place that makes you doubt your capabilities!