When all you have is today!

“I don’t want to live anymore”, said the healthy but tired soul.

“I don’t want to die, please save me”, said the dying, wrecked soul..

Yet before we ever acknowledge the desire to live, dawns a realisation that someone has already finished writing the climax to our ending, as if to remind us that life works as per his plans. As if to remind us that being just a drop in the ocean doesn’t mean we can control him, who contains the ocean!

Every passing year is a gentle reminder that my days are now numbered, I can be certain of now but not tomorrow then why do my thoughts only think about what could be, and not what is?

Long pause…..! Imagine it…! Take a deep breath, think… Didn’t you ever feel it at some point in your life? It is anything but depressing, it’s the poignant truth! Life, finally looks more precious than all the materialistic things hoarded over the years.

When I see people succumbing to covid 19 I am scared, for tomorrow is a distant thought. All the dreams and all the plans may never be accomplished. What is, is now! If that’s what it is then I’d start focussing on the small feats.

Small feats that give big joys like making my daughter smile, investing time in her growth, being there for her everyday, like there’s no tomorrow!

International Women’s Day

Hello there, no need to remind you all that we are living in the 21st century because it’s an obvious fact but it is still surprising that I have lived 3 decades and more and have celebrated the same event with the same zeal and fervor every year. I am talking about the International Women’s Day, every year without fail I have cut a cake, sometime more than a cake and will do so for as long as I live. No silly, not because this day makes me happy but because co-incidentally it’s my birthday! Yes, I was born on a beautiful, eventful day and I was so proud of it as if I was the custodian of this occasion, and believe you me, I took it seriously.

Time passed and every year taught me a different lesson, why was I even happy about this day? why couldn’t all the days be so happy, warm, and kind to my fellow women world-wide? Why did people reserve their respects only for the 8th March? Then as I grew up, this day felt more like a joke because I realised those that I believed were reserving their respects were being forced to treat us well but only on that day. I think let’s call it off, let’s not celebrate this day or us anymore. I think women across the globe would be OK to do away with this day, especially women at workplaces.

We have all come a long way and I am thankful to all the women who have helped me become the person that I am. I am glad their stories inspired me, and their toil strengthened my beliefs. I am glad they set nonpareil standards because even the insurmountable challenges in my life look timid and possible. At the same time, I am also thankful to those that taught me to not take my freedom for granted, or let others walk over my ambitions. I celebrate these women every single day, I may still cut the cake on the 8th but I know I am significant and when you realise that, you don’t want anyone to do you the honours.

lost in translation

They say it doesn’t matter,
They say it doesn’t hurt
but the pain stays longer,
and no comfort is enough!
Memories just don’t disappear,
And dialogues keep resurfacing…
The times of togetherness,
Cause pain that’s undying
There’s no respite or freedom,
From the everlasting longing…
There’s no place or dwelling,
With any sense of belonging.
Have been re-visiting moments,
Have been writing stories,
Trying to find that person again
Who’s deeply etched in my memory.